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Gender Dictionary

December 26th, 2001


  1. Wants & needs (wontz and nedz) n.

    female: The delicate balance of emotional, physical and psychological
    longing one seeks to have fulfilled in a relationship.

    male: Food,sex and beer.

  2. Communication (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n.

    female: The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one’s partner.

    male: Scratching out a note before suddenly taking off for a weekend
    with the guys.

  3. Butt (but) n.

    female: The body part that every item of clothing manufactured makes
    “look bigger.”

    male: The organ used for mooning and holding a tool belt on.

  4. Commitment (ko-mit-ment) n.

    female: A desire to get married and raise a family.

    male: Not trying to pick up other women while out with one’s
    girlfriend.

  5. Entertainment (en-ter-tayn-ment) n.

    female: A good movie, concert, play or book.

    male: Anything with one ball, two folds, or three stooges.

  6. Flatulence (flach-u-lens) n.

    female: An embarrassing byproduct of digestion.

    male: An endless source of enterainment, self-expression and male
    bonding.

  7. Glass ceiling (glas see-ling) n.

    female: The invisible barrier that stops women from rising to the
    upper levels in business.

    male: What would really be great at work
    since that hot babe took over the office one flight up.

  8. Lesbian (lez-bi-an) n.

    female: A woman who makes love to other women.

    male: A woman who has sex with other women so men can watch and get
    really turned on.

  9. Making love (may-king luv) n.

    female: The greatest expression of intimacy a couple can achieve.

    male: What men have to call “boinking” to get women to boink.

  10. Remote control (ri-moht kon-trohl) n.

    female: A device for changing from one TV channel to another.

    male: A device for scanning through all 75 channels every 2 1/2
    minutes.

  11. Taste (tayst) v.

    female: Something you do frequently to whatever you’re cooking, to
    make sure it’s good.

    male: Something you must do to anything you
    think has gone bad, prior to tossing it out.

  12. Thingie (thing-ee) n.

    female: Any part under a car’s hood.

    male: The strapfastener on a woman’s bra.

  13. Vulnerable (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj.

    female: Fully opening up one’s self emotionally to another.

    male: Playing ball without a cup.

Gender, Lists, Relationship

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