Announcer:
Ladies and gentlemen, it’s time for America’s favorite metaphysical game show - Whose God Is It Anyway? With your host, Blaise Pascal!
Studio Audience: [wild applause]
Pascal: Good evening, America, and welcome to Whose God Is It Anyway?, the metaphysical game where contestants get to wager their earthly existence against an eternity of reward. Let’s get right down to business and meet tonight’s contestant, Arthur Johnson!
A portion of the stage rotates, bringing Arthur into frame. He waves gamely to the audience
Pascal: Hello, Arthur, and welcome to Whose God Is It Anyway? Are you ready to play our little game?
Arthur: I sure am, Blaise!
Pascal: Super. Okay, now, you know how are game is played. We’re going to show you a number of conceptions of God, the divinity, and the divine. You get to select one that’s right, one - of those (makes quote symbols with fingers) “Gods.” You then have to live your life abiding by that deity’s
rules and commandments. If you’re right, you win the blessed reward of that deity….
Arthur: Whoo!
Pascal:….but if you’re wrong, you face the eternal consequences of whichever deity is the true
God!
Arthur: Um, hold on a sec….
Pascal: So let’s get cracking! Black curtain at rear of stage falls, to reveal an overwhelming number of flashing displays Now then, after we had a little problem with Thomas Hobson last week, we’ve reorganized our categories of divine conceptions but all you have to do is pick one, and we’ll let you know what it is.
Arthur: Okay how about door number eighty-seven?
Pascal: Ah, those are the Greek and Roman pantheistic gods: Zeus, Hera, Athena. Typically speaking, they require obeisance and ritual, and can bestow benefits during your material existence. However, choosing to believe in them doesn’t usually get you a different outcome in the afterlife you’re going to Hades no matter what.
Arthur: So there’s not much point, huh? How about that door over there, “Forces”
Pascal: That’s an interesting choice those are the non-anthropomorphic conceptions of the Divine. Those notions of the deity don’t have a central personality at their core, but rather a “force” Buddha nature, the Universal Spirit, Cosmic Love.
Arthur: So, what happens if I choose a different God, and the right answer is in there?
Pascal (to audience, which starts to clap): Aaah, he’s catching on! (to Arthur) Absolutely nothing, Arthur! Those essences of deity don’t have human emotions, so they neither seek (nor demand) worship or belief. Their indifference results in a nondiscriminating afterlife, so there’s no consequence to disbelieving them. That’s why so few of our contestants pick from that group.
Arthur: So I want an anthropomorphic deity, who actually cares whether people believe in him or not! Otherwise there’s not benefit. How about that big blue curtain?
Pascal: Sorry, Arthur those are the many conceptions of an anthropomorphic Gods who are indifferent to belief. The Jewish notion of Yahweh, ancestor worship, and the many tribal spirits believe or not, you’re still assured a nice place in the happy hunting grounds.
Arthur: And the black box off in the corner?
Pascal: Those are the evil deities the concept of the universe created by a dark and uncaring God, who seeks only to torment the poor mortals he creates. If the real God is in there, you’re screwed no matter what you do!
Arthur: I’m so confused….
Audience (in unison): It’s time for Pascal’s Wager!
Pascal: Yes it is, folks. You see, Arthur, while my famous wager is usually described as being a broad choice between God and atheism, it actually incorporates some very strict assumptions about the nature of God. There are countless possible religions where “God” doesn’t care whether you believe in it or not, or where believing in “God” is only advantageous in mortal existence. My Wager assumes that “God” is an anthropormorphic deity with human-style desires to be acknowledged, loved and believed in.
Arthur: Well, then, that’s the group I want to pick from!
Pascal: Okay, Arthur then here we go!The left stage wall falls away, revealing a line of small colored boxes topped with bows. Each has a line of tags. The line stretches on endlessly.
Arthur: There’s so many….
Pascal: An infinite number, actually. After all, the concept of divinity cannot be bounded. There are more possible Gods than are capable of being comprehended by our nervous systems. Thus, there are an infinite number of different possible choices that you can make and if the true divine is not the one you choose, you’re toast!
Arthur: But I can’t possibly win! Since my odds are infinitely low, I might as well choose nothing at all and enjoy my life! The only way to win is not to play! Runs off stage to begin living life to the fullest!
Pascal: Well, we’ve lost another contestant but we’ll be back next week to entice a new soul here on…. Whose God Is It Anyway?!!
By Albaby
Philosophy, Religion