100 little bugs in the code,
100 bugs in the code,
fix one bug, compile it again,
101 little bugs in the code.
101 little bugs in the code…..
(Repeat until BUGS = 0)
From Allusions to Illusions
100 little bugs in the code,
100 bugs in the code,
fix one bug, compile it again,
101 little bugs in the code.
101 little bugs in the code…..
(Repeat until BUGS = 0)
Programming Languages are like Women
There are so many programming languages available that it can be very
difficult to get to know them all well enough to pick the right one
for you. On the other hand most men know what kind of woman appeals to
them. So here is a handy guide for many of the popular […]
There was once a COBOL programmer in the mid to late 1990s. For the sake of this story, we’ll call him Jack. After years of being taken for granted and treated as a technological dinosaur by all the UNIX programmers and Client/Server programmers and website developers, Jack was finally getting some respect. He’d become […]
The C Programmer
God consults with the C programmer on every major issue.
The C programmer can walk on water.
He programs on a P120 with 8 Meg RAM w/ Mach32. He can program a
graphical spreadsheet in about 2 days.
The C programmer tends to put “()” after every major verb when they
[…]
A guy was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, “If you kiss me, I’ll turn into a beautiful princess.” He bent over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket.
The frog spoke up again and said, “If you kiss me and turn me back into […]
Once upon a time, in a kingdom not far from here, a king summoned two of his advisors for a test. He showed them both a shiny metal box with two slots in the top, a control knob, and a lever. “What do you think this is?”
One advisor, an engineer, answered first. “It is a […]
At a recent computer software engineering course in the US, the participants were given an awkward question to answer:
“If you had just boarded an airliner and discovered that your team of programmers had been responsible for the flight control software, how many of you would disembark immediately?”
Among the ensuing forest of raised hands only one […]
“This code is a gagh! You have no honor!”
“A TRUE Klingon warrior does not comment his code!”
“By filing this bug you have questioned my family honor. Prepare to
die!”
“You question the worthiness of my Code?! I should kill you where
[…]
Real Programmers don’t eat quiche. They like twinkies, coke and palate-scorching Szechwan food.
Real Programmers don’t write applications programs. They program right down on the bare metal. Applications programming is for the dullards who can’t do systems programming.
Real Programmers don’t write specs. Users should be grateful for whatever they get: they are lucky to get any […]
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